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The Positive  Young  Minds Blog

Love at Christmas time

14/12/2017

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Man with children
Photo by Jude Beck on Unsplash
 How do you show love in every day life?  

​How do you show love at Christmas time?.  

At Christmas we can rush around wanting to show our love for our family and friends.  However, this time of the year which combines Christmas time with endings, beginnings and transitions that occur at the end of the year, can often be a stressful time among families.  We often find our frustration tolerance low and and our ability to show our love through kindness and patience can be tested.

There are a number of ways you can create Christmas Calm in  your house.  The following is a reminder to keep our eyes on what is important at Christmas.

1 Corinthians 13 is often used in wedding ceremonies as it is a wonderful illustration of love. The link below will take you to a paralled text of 1 Corinthians 13 that reminds us of the meaning of Christmas: www.appleseeds.org/1_Cor_13_Xmas.htm

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls,
but do not show love to my family, I'm just another decorator.

If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals
and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family, I'm just another cook.

If I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family, it profits me nothing.
.

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7 Easy Ways to Connect with Other People at Christmas

8/12/2017

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Does Christmas find you feeling lonely? 

Are you looking for easy ways to connect with other people at Christmas?  

Feeling connected is important for your mental health, with strong links between loneliness and depression; social connectedness and feeling happier.  But where do you start?

Changing your mindset around loneliness is an important part of feeling more connected, but gift giving provides you with a unique opportunity to reach out to others in a practical and tangible way.  
It's wonderful to be able to choose gifts that reduce Christmas stress, but here's one way you can look beyond traditional gift giving and strengthen your connections.  
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Begin by finding a moment of quiet and think about people you have interacted with this year.  It may be neighbours, family, friends, work mates, members of sporting groups, people you know through school, people you regularly buy groceries or other retail products from, parents of your children’s friends, online connections etc.
​
  1. Choose 7 people and focus on what is special about them.  In what little, or big, ways they have been a part of your life this year.  Jot down some of their qualities, interests, anything you know about them.  It’s OK if it’s not much.  The fact they have been a part of your life is what is important.  They may not even realise you would think about them!  It's also OK if you don't have 7, you can do this for 1 person.
  2. Choose something to do for them.  This may be making them a card, sending them a shout out thank you on social media, making them a gingerbread person or including them in a loving kindness meditation or prayer.
  3. Give them the gift/card in person or mail it/leave it in their letter box.
  4. Do this without any expectations of receiving anything in return.  This is you acknowledging and thanking them for whatever role they have played in your life.  It may be, for whatever reason, you want to do this anonymously.  And of course, if you choose to include them in a loving kindness meditation or pray for them they aren't going to know about it. 
  5. Encourage your children/child to do this for someone in their life (they can choose more than one if they wish).
  6. Practice random acts of connectedness: for example, hold open a door for someone, say hello to a stranger, smile at the people serving you in the shops.
  7. If you are on Facebook or Instagram, stop scrolling and leave a positive comment.

If you want to find out more about creating connections, you may enjoy listening to my podcast - Creating Connections.  

Chat soon

Kim 

*updated 20th October 2023


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    Disclaimer

    * These articles are provided by Kim Ross, Psychologist for general information and education .  They are not designed to be used for therapy..  If you are experiencing stress please contact your GP or mental health professional. 

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    Kim Ross is an Online Psychologist and Founder of Positive Young Minds and Private Practice Sustainability. 

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