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Four steps to perseverance.

26/2/2017

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What would you buy as a souvenir on a trip? Would you buy a 5x5 Rubik's cube?  You would if you were one of my children.  Why? was my question.  Because it's cool was the response.  We do have a Rubik's cube at home that has been picked up and put down, without being solved, a few times over the year.  So I was a little bemused that this was their bring home choice from a recent school camp.  

What I didn't expect was that they would pick up the 3x3 and spend most of their waking time over the last two days working at completing the cube.  They have shown determination, enthusiasm, creativity and curiosity.  They have researched the internet, explored apps and worked with their father (their mother is way to visual-spatially challenged to be of any assistance).  Now they have started writing up their own instruction sheet.  When they have been frustrated they have tried a different approach.

As a mum it's great to be able to step back and see this determination, to watch them developing a strength of perseverance.  Why, because perseverance entails voluntarily finishing what you start, despite obstacles and with pleasure.  It's not them finishing something after I've prompted and nagged.  Perseverance increases self-confidence as they learn to trust their abilities.


Common steps needed to develop perseverance  include.
  1. Have a goal you care about (completing a Rubik's cube, by myself).
  2. Have a plan, break it into steps (use as much help as available to complete it, then gradually use less help).
  3. Ignore negativity of those around you (in this case there wasn't any).
  4. Have at least one person who will encourage you (there were adults around to help them talk through instructions, show them, encourage them to keep trying and remind them that when they were younger they didn't learn to walk in one day).

I also pointed out to them that they are showing perseverance and how great that is to see.  

As parents we can have a huge impact on helping our children develop perseverance.  What are they passionate about?  What goals could they set around this?  How can they achieve these goals?  Praise their efforts, help them work through their frustrations.  

How long does it take to solve a Rubik's cube?  I can't actually answer that question yet.  But with they will get there.
For information about how to help your child develop their strengths
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    Kim Dunn is a Child Psychologist and Founder of Positive Young Minds.  

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  • COUNSELLING
    • Session Fee Policy
    • FAQ
  • What is Mindfulness?
    • Mindfulness For Children
    • For Teens
    • For Parents
    • Some science behind mindfulness
  • Confident Parenting
    • How to talk to teens
  • About Kim
  • Creating Connection (blog)
  • Psychologists
    • The Victorian Psychologists' Networking Group
    • Peer Mentoring
    • Essential Self-Care for Psychologists